November and December are known to be seasons of gratitude and joy. Yet, those feelings may be overshadowed by busyness, stress, and challenging conversations with friends and family. Holiday stress comes in all shapes and sizes. It could be financial, lack of time to get everything done, or the magnitude of family expectations. According to the American Psychological Association, 43 percent of U.S. adults report that stress impacts how much they are able to enjoy the holidays. The holidays can also be a busy time for many with increased social commitments, shopping, hosting, and traveling between family members’ homes. With your mind filled with to do lists, maintaining a sense of calm and connection with yourself may feel out of reach.
Additionally, difficult conversations can add to the stress. “When are you going to have kids?” “Are you dating anyone?” The holidays can bring more time with friends and family, and with that, so many questions. The questions, while well meaning, may bring up deep pain or seem to impose expectations of others. Infertility. Pregnancy loss. A desire to be married. A painful breakup. Or, a contentment in singleness or being married without children. A lack of understanding or respect for your life decisions. The rise of pain, shame, or loss of words can be swift.
Thinking through in advance how to care for yourself and respond to others before a season of busyness, stress, and difficult conversations can ease some of the burden and help you connect with gratitude and joy.
- Establish boundaries: Set boundaries internally for what you will and will not do. Clearly communicate about expectations and needs with others.
- Do a breathing exercise: If feeling overwhelmed, practice box breathing by inhaling for four seconds, holding your breath for four seconds, and exhaling for four seconds.
- Take a walk: If you need to step away in the midst of a social gathering, excuse yourself and take a walk to the restroom or around the block.
- Journal: Process any feelings that may have come up by writing them down. You could also journal a prayer as a way to connect with God.
- Talk with a trusted friend or family member: Find time to talk with a friend or family member who can provide support.
While it may not seem like it, the holidays are a short period of time with a specific end date. Through it all, 2 Corinthians 12:19 provides encouragement that God does not leave us alone in any difficult situation. “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’”
If you are struggling with stress or in your relationship with yourself or your family, we are here to help! Give us a call or send an email at [email protected].